In case you missed it, July is NaBloPoMo (national blog posting month), created by BlogHer. I have obviously missed the boat on blogging everyday in July at this point, but one of the prompts did catch my attention:
Do you like your name? (from July 9)
This is a pretty loaded question for me.
I have two names that appear on all official documents. My first name is a Korean one (hence the “J” that comes before Rosel) which is actually a fairly common girls’ name. But when my parents decided to immigrate to Canada, they thought, like many immigrant parents do, that I should also have an English name so I could assimilate better. I also had a Catholic name at that point – in Korea, when you get baptized as a Catholic you are given a name of a saint – which was “Roselle.” (This is what I was told, except Google is not giving me any results for “Saint Roselle,” so I am starting to doubt the reality of this saint I was named after – but that’s for another time.) So they decided to go with that. Except they spelled it “Rosel” on my immigration forms.
Cue confusion.
First off, any foreigner’s attempt to pronounce my Korean name rarely goes well, unless they really, really try. Even then, it just doesn’t sound very pretty. No problem, this is where my supposedly “Western” name comes in, right?
Except when I introduce myself, this happens:
Stranger: Hi, my name is [so-and-so]. What’s your name?
Me: Nice to meet you, I’m Rosel.
Stranger: Josie/Rosa/Rosalind? What a nice name!
Other close calls: “Rosle.” Or “Rozzle.” Or something that closely resembles “Russell.” One professor who shall not be named called me all three variations all semester, despite my attempts, my peers’ attempts (“like what ROSE-ELLE said…”) and my private correction during his office hour. Dear teachers: please learn your students’ names, or just ask if you don’t remember. It’s way better than pretending, or even worse, not caring. It makes your students feel like they do not matter at all.
Funny how that Westernized name which was supposed to make my life easier still makes it so hard for people to remember my name.
Then there’s the more political aspect, as names are not just neutral nouns. There’s evidence (both anecdotally and academically) that people with “foreign” names are often passed over for interviews in the resume-screening stages. I wonder how “Rosel” might fare in the process – but I suspect that my very Korean last name also gives away my ethnicity without me having to show up for an interview. Some immigrants who gave themselves Westernized names are reverting back to their original names to reclaim their heritage. I’ve given this a lot of thought as well – since I am feeling more like I’m reclaiming the “Korean” part of my “Korean Canadian” identity these days – but the years of growing up with my strange “Western” name made me feel attached to being Rosel. Maybe it’s also my selfish desire to stand out in some way, because my Korean name is so darn common. Maybe it’s my still-lingering internalized racism that makes me hesitate towards an entirely Korean name. In a way, I think it fits my identity quite well – not quite “western,” not really Korean, but something in between, perpetually mispronounced and mis-identified (like my ethnicity or my origin).
So there you have it. Now I want to know: do you like your name?
[image via weheartit.com]
Helen
/ July 11, 2011When my dad filled out my sister’s birth certificate, he decided that since often when he wanted to use an i in English it would really be a y, he should write my sister’s name as Julya rather than Julia. Conveniently, her birthday is in July.
Hajnoczky is certainly not easy for most people to pronounce. I’m grateful when people just sound it out instead of inserting extra, random letters (Hajnitski, Hazenkowski, etc). It does bug me a bit when anglophones insist on trying to pronounce it with a faux Hungarian accent, making me say it 10 times to get the aj sound and the cadence right (which they normally can’t mimic). Haj-not-ski or Hi-note-ski are just fine, and clearer than a garbled version of the way a Hungarian would pronounce it.
Though my name is Helen, it’s the English version of my grandma’s name, Ilona. Strangely, however, Hungarian friends and family members call me Helénke, which is like Helen with a Hungarian accent and ending. I think this is sort of a cute nod to my dual linguistic and cultural identities.
Actually, the first time I went to see my grandmother’s grave in Vancouver, on Christmas Eve, I expected her name to be written in Hungarian. Instead I looked down at the grave of ‘Helen Hajnoczky.’ Chilling… and very A Christmas Carol.
My middle name is also the über magyar Rosza Anna, which my elementary school always spelled wrong on my report card. My dad would make a huge deal out of this and write corrections on the document in giant writing with large arrows indicating the mistakes.
As a kid I found the complicated, unpronounceable, and un-spellable names a nuisance, but now that I’m older I appreciate having a name that signals my Hungarian background. Living away from home I barely speak Hungarian, and I feel like my name sort of allows me to outwardly maintain the Hungarian half of my identity, which has been a big part of my life and is important to me.
Beth Hong
/ July 11, 2011Wow, what an amazing entry. I am also conflicted about my name, with is pretty darn hard for most non-Korean speakers to pronounce (Eun Hee). I also remember getting my high school diploma and feeling rather apathetic that the BC government had gotten my name so completely wrong- I graudated as ‘Hee Hong’ (no joke). Anyways, the fact that I never bothered to contact the Ministry of Education to change it has always sat uneasily in the back of my mind. I am sure there are so many more cases of misspelled Korean names on official documents all over the place, and I hope I’m not alone in the strange anxiety/apathy it rouses.
Jordana
/ July 11, 2011Interesting post Rosel! I’ve always wondered if it would be seen as poser-ish to “reclaim” my Chinese name. Oddly enough, I’ve even had other Chinese people tell me that I pronounce my name wrong, not knowing that the way it’s pronounced is how it’s said in my mother’s dialect. I’ve also had the same problem as you where people get my English name utterly wrong and always question me where it came from since it’s not a typical “English name for a Chinese person.” I find it interesting how certain Western names become reserved for Chinese people (e.g. Vincent, Raymond, Eunice etc). Is it similar for Koreans too?
RK
/ July 12, 2011That’s a good question Jordana…I’m not sure there are “English names for Koreans” that are quite as recognizable as the English names for the Chinese (I’d add Eileen to that list). I know a few Korean Americans/Canadians with the name Jane, so I guess that might count?